Water Off a Duck's Back~Muffin

I like to bitch...a lot. I am a non-stop complaining machine only comparable to sitcom wives and B-rated horror movie ghost. And while it's been shown that "complainers" live longer, I've been known to get on the nerves of those around me. Wait,  there is a point to all this. While I was complaining aimlessly to a friend (I think it had something to do with socks and old condoms) she tried to advise me with an old saying; "like water off a duck's back."

After that statement I recall very little of the remainder of the conversation as I was completely overcome with a compulsive desire to dump a large bucket of water onto a duck. While I understand that an amateur attempt at water-boarding  a cute animal can be misinterpreted, I must know what exactly water off a duck's back looks like. With the fervent manner my friend stated that common simile, there must be some mystical force field that surrounds each and every duck, protecting it from the unwarranted assaults from pudgy, bucket wielding women. If that is true, it must be explored to fullest extent. Can ducks also deflect other liquids, like salt water, or orange juice? Could the power of duck be harnessed used for other purposes, like deflecting embarrassing spills off of a skirt while on a date? The possibilities are unlimited.


Random Duck Facts

1. In World War 2, General Motors developed  the DUKW, popularly known as a "Duck," that was the first amphibious transport to be used in combat. 

2. What came first, "the duck", or "to duck?" Well according to etymologist, duck comes from the Old English tern "ducan" which means "to duck, dive" with ducks being named after the way they dive under the water while eating.

3. Male ducks are called "drakes," while the females are called "hens."

4. Contrary to internet lore, a duck's quack does indeed echo.

5. Foie Gras is a well known gourmet dish originating in France. Foie Gras is a liver of a duck who has been forced fed to the point it's liver swells to ten times it's normal size. It's quite tender. 

6. Feather pillows are most commonly stuffed with duck or goose down. 

From one quack to another,
Muffin